Rum and monkeys and me

grinderman2:

rebellious-hufflepuff-love:

grinderman2:

frozenfoxtails:

grinderman2:

*gets on tiptoes to whisper into dairy cow’s ear* why ya titty out

How short are you that you need to stand on your toes to talk to a cow?

Looks like we got ourselves a city slicker

How freaking talk are your cows? My cousins own a dairy farm and the cows are about chest height.

You sure talk a lot of shit for someone whose cousin has short cows

stileslydiamartinstilinski:

spaceisprettycool:

cronusnyeh:

refusingtosinkmyship:

paxamgays:

it’s weird how bra commercials are more aimed towards straight male audiences more than the audience that’s actually gonna buy a fuckn bra

If it were aimed toward women, it would be like “THIS BRA IS COMFY AS SHIT! YOU WON’T WANNA TAKE IT OFF. LOOK AT THE HIRED MALE ACTORS SWOONING OVER THE HIRED ACTRESS”

SOOOOLD

THIS BRA WILL MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE CHRIS EVANS IS PERSONALLY HOLDING YOUR BREASTS 24/7. LOOK THIS SHIT COMES IN LIKE 78 DIFFERENT COLORS TO MATCH YOUR SKIN TONE OR YOUR CLOTHING OR WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT, YOU GOT OPTIONS! NO LACE WE CAN DO NO LACE THAT SHIT ITCHES. YOU WANT POLKADOTS FUCK YEAH POLKA DOTS! LOOK EACH CUP HAS POCKETS IN IT FUCKING HELL POCKETS IN YOUR BRA CALM THE FUCK DOWN WORLD LET ME TAKE THIS ALL IN. MACHINE WASHABLE FUCK YEAH THROW THIS SHIT IN YOUR WASHER, IT’S NOT GONNA TANGLE, IT’S MADE WITH ASGARDIAN BILGESNIPE TAIL HAIR IT’S INDESTRUCTABLE. THIS BRA’S GONNA BEEP IF IT DETECTS CANCER IN YOUR BOOBS THAT SHIT AIN’T RIGHT SO CHECK YOUR BOOBS PEOPLE. FUCK YEAH THIS BRA IS AMAZING. SCIENCE. 

You had me at “this bra will make you feel like Chris Evans is personally holding your breasts 24/7”

tinierpurplefishes:

insta-gramcracker:

re-actr:

thecutestofthecute:

Girls hit your hallelujah 

Girls hit your hallelujah

GIRLS HIT YOUR HALLELUJAH 

CAUSE CUTE SMALL DOGS GON GIVE IT TO YA

puptown funk

Stop.

Wait a minute.

Here’s my bowl:

Put some kibble in it